


victor

by Dissonencia



Category: Bleach
Genre: 686, Canon Compliant, F/M, FIx It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 18:42:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7903498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dissonencia/pseuds/Dissonencia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ichigo, her letter would begin, I do not know what war you've won.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Rukia handwrites letters for Ichigo. 

Even if she’s busy, out for a mission, or during a day off, or even when the day is only a few hours old - dusty gray and blue fighting over for the sky and the last of fireflies retreating into the forest - regardless, she’ll find time.

At most, she writes to him four times a month, enough to include all the recent happenings in Soul Society; she tells him little bits of nothings and everythings.

_ Ichigo _ , her letters would always begin.

But she doesn’t want to be presumptuous - limits are now in place and she doesn’t want to overstep an unspoken, fragile truce, so she doesn’t put  _ dear _ before the name.

After his name, she would pause, think of the next lines,  _ pause _ , smoothen the paper’s creases and dust it,  _ pause _ , then think of starting easy and casual.

She tells him things he might or might not care about; a mix of menial, ordinary, random and important events such as when Bonnie-chan the Shibas’ boar (which actually survived the war) gave birth to 23 piglets and one was gifted to her out of bad humor and one for her brother, when a human contraption called  _ motorcycle  _ became revolutionary transportation means, when the piglets received their own mud pond and garden in the Kuchiki estate, when the last time Ukitake- _ taichou _ and she shared a free afternoon and a pot of jasmine tea was on her birthday and he wished her happiness, when Ichika was born.

Rukia tells him of her captaincy and how there are too many brats in her division nowadays, and how his scowl became a trend and everybody wants to bleach their hair. On weekends, they stir so much trouble for her, and how she misses talking to her captain.

Then: she tells him how very, very sorry she is for Renji, that Ichika is growing too fast and likes to pick fights for her young age, her brother, still clan head and ever strong.

She tells Ichigo that 9 years after the war, her bottom drawers overflow with unsent letters for him.

It isn’t a secret, but it isn’t an open knowledge either - and it’s something that Renji respects and guards very well.  

Rukia knows he knows who she’s writing to, but he keeps quiet about it. Their daughter, when she isn’t out causing troubles, would curl on her lap while she writes letters for Ichigo and try to read the lines.  

If Ichika falls asleep on her lap, Renji, if he’s near, would carefully whisk her away. He’s wordless and turns away quick, almost apologetically as if he stumbled onto a terrible, intimate secret.  _ There is this part of your heart I don't own, I know I can’t trespass _ , he almost told her one day, and she almost apologized - she never did, but she thought of the thousands other things she needs to apologize to Renji for.

Still, Rukia likes to believe her heart is equally divided to its occupants. There’s a part for her brother, for her husband, for her daughter, and for some memories she would like to safekeep. 

Rukia keeps her letters folded and stacked neatly in the bottom three drawers of her desk inside her room, under lock and key and  _ kido _ .

She never sends them to Ichigo, these half-wish, half-regret, half-dreams, half-secret, half-hope, whole truths and never lies remain untouched inside her drawers - these letters are quiet little deaths, necessary casualties for happiness.

_ Ichigo _ , her letter would begin,  _ I do not know what war you have won, or if you have won at all. _


	2. Chapter 2

This is no story of destiny. 

Unlike Rukia, Ichigo does not write letters. He has nothing to tell because what needs to be said these days? 

Life now is seamless for Ichigo, it follows this pattern unhampered:  _ on and on _ , and on, and on, and on. 

The next days come undifferentiated and so are nightfalls, along with the other next days and next years. Then 9 nine years flew by fast. 

Ichigo never had much time to comprehend it all, how he’s this and that, how he’s a bit of everything, not quite human, not quite shinigami, not quite quincy, not quite hollow; how he could live in whatever void and it’ll fit him just fine. He never had much practice for introspection anyway because life, as always,  _ life _ , and  _ death,  _ got on the way.

The thought is always below his awareness, slightly out of reach, due to the fatal urgency of the various battles that beat at him; it’s of little concern when worlds weight heavy.

When everyone has gone ahead, when there is no one who chases him, when he stops looking over his shoulder, when there’s no one to catch up to, and when he can’t wait anymore, then his heart stops beating impatiently.

Once then twice, there was a promise of destiny, vivid and proud and strong and unabashed it burns brighter than the sun, then, there were some things about  _ promotions  _ and  _ for goods,  _ too but the ground beneath him had not been solid all along.

It is not to say he is unhappy, but there is nothing to suggest he is otherwise. But Ichigo knows all too well, this is no story of destiny.


	3. Chapter 3

Ichigo asked Orihime if she’d like to be with him a year after the war. High school crush, how lovely, how equally tall and beautiful, how dreamy, others said. 

So in love, she says shyly, if someone asks how they’re doing. It’s good, he says nonetheless - like clockwork, an instant follow-up reply. 

Their first kiss happened on that celebrated February day. Months after. Spring bloomed fair. Summer was not endless. Autumn passed. Then came winter. Then on January, nearly a year later, Ichigo proposed to Orihime. 

_ It’s fine, we can learn, we can be good together _ , he tells the bright lights and blurred faces and lamp posts that ask him after his 9th  _ sake  _ shot. He still do after 7 years of marriage and even after Kazui had been born and had not been a toddler for years.

.

.

.

In a nearby soccer field, a few blocks from where the Kurosaki house stood, Ichigo coaches a small group of school-age kids on how to play soccer whenever he’s not running the clinic or on-duty in the hospital every Saturday afternoons.

Orihime, with Kazui in tow, comes around 5:50 pm, both waving at him from the other side and ready to come home. 

Ichigo raises his left hand in acknowledgement.

They went home together, Kazui is holding his mother’s hand, and he lets them walk few paces ahead him. 

**Author's Note:**

> ahh, i said i won’t be on board the angst train - i’ll be working on something else instead, but i ended up catching the train. i’m very late. canon-compliant first, then fix-it.


End file.
